How do I know if my inner child needs healing? 

Written by: Sienna Wallwork, Program Assistant, Bsc. Family & Community Social Services. (She/Her/Hers) 

The simplest way to explain the inner child is that it is a version of our past selves we still carry with us. Whether you have been aware of it up until now or not, we all have an inner child. Even if you do not feel connected to it, it is there. Your inner child can explain why you react to certain things the way you do. Many of us have inner child wounds, from various traumas we have experienced. There are a few tell-tale signs that your inner child is wounded (and luckily, there are many ways to start the healing process).  

It is important to listen to your inner child, and learn to love them properly. Many of these wounds come from a variety of sources. It can be anything from outright, obvious abuse to more subtle things that you may not have caught (such as emotional neglect or verbal belittling from those we were supposed to be able to trust). Additionally, a lot of us receive inner child wounds from society. Society often makes people (especially young, vulnerable people) feel like they must fit into a certain mold. When we don’t fit this, it can result in inner wounds.  

Now that we know what an inner child is and where these wounds can come from, what are the signs that your inner child is wounded? Here are some signs that you have a wounded inner child. 

The first sign is that when you are upset, you are speaking to yourself in a negative way. This happens because children are very sensitive; so it makes sense that your inner child can be just as sensitive. Similarly, since your inner child can be so sensitive, small things sending you spiraling can be a sign of a wounded inner child, since everything can feel so intense to a child. 

Other signs of a wounded inner child include constant seeking of validation, trust issues, and a part of you feeling unlovable. 

Citations 

Davis, S. (n.d.). The Wounded Inner Child. CPTSDfoundationorg. Retrieved July 29, 2022, from https://cptsdfoundation.org/2020/07/13/the-wounded-inner-child/