Creativity & Healing – Exploring the Inner Child
By: Umair Memon, Gatehouse Placement Student Addiction & Mental Health
We spend three weeks on ‘Inner Child’ in the Peer Support Phase 1. As the sexual abuse took place when we were children, importance is given in exploring inner child work. This is an expansive topic and individuals can choose to spend considerable time doing inner child work outside of group as the three weeks can still not be enough for individuals. I wanted to discuss the connection between the inner child and the creativity that children pose.
Not all of the inner child work has to be about the abuse. We explore ideas of what brought us joy in our childhood, ways we expressed our creativity, what we wanted to be when we grow up? What caught our attention as a child? Any music? Car? Toy? An event? A trip? Colors that attracted us or sounds? Maybe even familiar fond smells, like a fresh cone in an ice cream store? If you have made it too adulthood chances are that you have been able to navigate a whole plethora of situations and are here today.
You are here. Against all odds, your wisdom has led you to be here, to survive.
Amongst many of the darker situations we explore, we can also look with curiosity as to what was our ability to survive. Something must have gotten us through those dark times. Was it music? Cooking? A Sport? A friend? A pet? Exploring those connections that allowed you to make it here can tell us a story. In a lot of cases that’s where our creativity might be.
As a child I was obsessed with a 99-piece generic Lego set. I would make and break countless houses, things over and over again. I loved the freedom and the joy of having the ability to make anything I wanted. This set stayed in a pink plastic bag. Those are all memories I have of my childhood playing with Lego.
As an adult I have a few star war pieces that I have made and they occupy my time with something I enjoy. As an adult I feel playing with Legos has helped me envision different possibilities with physical spaces working previously in an industrial manufacturing. Allowing me to see or envision what would help to improve the flow or increase space in layouts. As an adult I also enjoy math and I am good with numbers. I find which also requires some form of creativity to solve problems.
I can’t help but even envision a version of the Gatehouse where the ground floor larger bathroom and kitchen are opened up to a new wing keeping the integrity of the existing house but giving us more space for a number of different programs. I can’t help myself. If you look at the house from the outside, you will notice the side on the west has clear space before the trees begin. I think this would be perfect for an expansion. No body ask me to do this. It is something I explored on my own. We could even have a basement, maybe a glass façade to offset the heritage building. Possibilities are endless.
Another way I tap into my creativity is with food. I think food has been a coping mechanism for me and now as an adult I have explored that by developing a passion for cooking. I find the allows me to express my creativity with ingredients and allows me to play with a number of different formulas to get the balance or flavor right. The formula seems mathematical and it might be, but it could mean anything, could be the technique of cooking, the size, the layering of flavors anything. Another reason food works for me is that just like with Lego allows me to work with my hands. I also feel with my recovery I have increased my capacity to be patient with myself and now find myself baking bread, which before I could not do as I had little or no patience. Oddly enough I remember the first time I cooked was being taken to a Japanese restaurant and sitting at the teppanyaki counter. I was so amazed and I tried to recreate that at home.
If you feel comfortable, explore those memories that mesmerized you as a child with excitement, that held your attention and curiosity. Visit those in a safe space, see what it might be like to reconnect with those joys. This does not mean that all forms of creativity might translate in our adult life, but I do feel it might be worth looking into what made you happy as a child and trying to tap into that wisdom and be curious as to see how that might translate in our adult life.