The Sacred Path – Asking for Help and Overcoming Shame
Asking for help is an important part of the Sacred Path. Many survivors may feel ashamed or embarrassed to ask for help, or they may feel that they should be able to handle their healing journey on their own. However, asking for help can be a powerful act of courage and vulnerability, and can be an essential step toward healing. Overcoming shame associated with asking for help can be a difficult but important part of the healing journey for survivors of childhood sexual abuse. Survivors of childhood sexual abuse may feel ashamed of asking for help for several reasons including internalized shame where survivors may feel that the abuse was their fault or that they somehow deserved it. This can lead to feelings of shame and self-blame that make it difficult to ask for help. Survivors may be afraid of being judged by others including being seen as weak or damaged if they ask for help. Additionally, survivors may have difficulty trusting others after experiencing betrayal and trauma. This can make it difficult to open up and ask for help. Here are some reasons why asking for help is part of the Sacred Path:
Healing is a journey: Healing from childhood sexual abuse is a process. It takes time, self-compassion, and patience. Asking for help can provide survivors with the support and resources they need to continue on their journey, even when it feels challenging or overwhelming.
Connection: Connection with others is an essential part of the healing journey. Asking for help can help survivors build relationships with others who can offer support, empathy, and understanding.
Vulnerability is strength: Asking for help requires vulnerability and courage, and it can be a powerful act of self-care. It takes strength to admit that you need assistance, and it can be a powerful way to take control of your healing journey.
It can help break down shame and stigma: Asking for help can help survivors break down feelings of shame and self-blame that can be associated with childhood sexual abuse. By reaching out for assistance, survivors can begin to reframe their experiences and find new ways of relating to themselves and others.
It can provide new perspectives: Seeking help from a mental health professional, support group, or another resource can provide survivors with new perspectives and insights that can be helpful in the healing journey. It can also help survivors develop new skills and coping strategies that can be useful in other areas of their lives.
Overcoming shame is a powerful step in being able to ask for help. Asking for help can be an act of courage and strength, not weakness. It takes courage to be vulnerable and reach out for assistance when you need it. Here are some strategies to stop shame in its tracks:
Challenge negative self-talk: Survivors may have internalized messages of shame and self-blame associated with their experiences of childhood sexual abuse. It can be helpful to challenge these negative thoughts and replace them with more positive and affirming messages.
Seek support: Connecting with others who have gone through similar experiences can be a powerful way to overcome the shame associated with asking for help. Survivors can seek out support groups, online forums, or other resources where they can connect with others who can offer empathy and understanding.
Reframe asking for help as a positive step: Instead of viewing asking for help as a negative or shameful act, survivors can reframe it as a positive step towards healing and growth.
Practice self-compassion: Practicing self-compassion can be an important part of overcoming shame. This involves treating yourself with kindness, understanding, and empathy, rather than self-criticism and judgment.
Work with a mental health professional: A therapist or counselor can provide a safe and non-judgmental space for survivors to explore their feelings of shame and develop strategies for overcoming them.
It is important to remember that healing from childhood sexual abuse is a unique and individual process, and what works for one survivor may not work for another. You are not alone. Healing is possible. With time, survivors can begin to break down the barriers that shame creates and move towards a place of healing and growth.