Understanding & Releasing Anger
Written By: Daniella Tucci, Practicum Student
What is anger? According to the American Psychological Association anger is an emotion characterized by antagonism toward someone or something that you feel has done wrong to you (n.d.).
To understand the emotion of anger we need to recognize that anger is a secondary feeling that follows other feelings. This means that depending on the situation oftentimes we might feel shocked, upset, scared, amongst other feelings, which then triggers our anger response.
Did you know that there are two types of anger?
Residual: any anger we feel or hold from our past.
Reactive: any anger we face in the present.
For childhood sexual abuse survivors, the emotion of anger is a natural, as well as a necessary emotion that is essential to their healing process. The feeling of anger can help give survivors the motivation to assert self-respect as well as create boundaries. It is ultimately the survivor’s choice to decide how they will respond to the anger they hold. At The Gatehouse we encourage survivors to take the anger they hold from their abuse and use that to help motivate and guide them on their healing journey.
“From my experience dealing with anger, it didn’t serve me. When I did approach anger from a positive manner, it helped me progress to better coping with my anger, so that my anger didn’t turn into rage and get me into trouble. I learned to P.A.U.S.E. at The Gatehouse, use mindfulness, go for a walk. I kept a stone in my pocket to help me ground myself. I tried journalling to a certain degree. I would focus on my anger and see what was happening to me. I would refocus to ground myself.” – Stewart Thompson, Peer Facilitator, Advocate, and Thriver
At The Gatehouse we guide our participants in a four-step process to release their anger…
- Acknowledge: the feelings and emotions connected to anger
- Identify: the feelings connected to your anger
- Choose: to make rational decisions
- Take Steps: to release tension
Survivors are often unsure if change is possible in relation to expressing their anger, but with time and effort our responses to anger can be changed. It is possible to learn unlearn old habits and learn new, healthier ways to respond to anger. At The Gatehouse we would like to help childhood sexual abuse survivors understand that anger CAN become a healthy and productive feeling. For more information on our Phase 1 program, please visit https://thegatehouse.org
References
American Psychological Association. (n.d.). Anger and aggression. American Psychological Association. Retrieved October 22, 2021, from https://www.apa.org/topics/anger.
The Gatehouse. (2020). Phase 1 peer support group participant manual.
